How to fine tune emotional intelligence to get ahead

How to fine tune emotional intelligence to get aheadHow to fine tune emotional intelligence to get aheadEmotional intelligence or EQ a buzz-word that was coined in the 90s, is still regularly explored by academics and psychologists today. Based on self-awareness and empathy, EQ is recognized as an important personal and professional quality, but few truly understand how to enhance it or leverage its benefits.Like training for a sport or learning an instrument, EQ can be developed at any age and better yet, it can be strengthened, conditioned and fine-tuned.Defining EQEmotional intelligence is the ability to identify, manage and express yur own emotions and the emotions of others. A great place to see EQ in action is in the world of music. When artists play and perform they need to be in tune with those around them, including their fellow band members and the audience. The fruchtwein successful bands are made up of artists that not only master their own craft but have an ear for wh at others are expressing anticipating the emotional highs and lows, the flow and pace of a performance.VH1 made a name for itself documenting music legends shredding each other apart in Behind The Music a series that might have been more appropriately called Epic Music EQ Failures. Rivalries, jealousies and the furies of fame always seemed to get in the way and drowned out the music.On the flip side, if you look at bands with longevity U2 or Pearl Jam you see musicians with heightened self-awareness and a greater aptitude for harnessing their emotions. It was remarkable to me to see Pearl Jams acceptance speech at the Rock Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony as the band thanked all of the people who helped propel and sustain them.Understanding EQIn order to build emotional intelligence, we first must understand why it really matters both in ur own lives and to those we care about.Consider the role of EQ in business. The authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 point outEQ drives more than half of our job performancePeople with high EQ make almost $30,000 more each year than their lower EQ counterparts90% of top performers in business, sports, and the arts have high EQGood leadership is at times subjective, but a common thread is an ability to assess and take bold risks. EQ is an essential tool in calculating the risks worth taking. In his seminal book on EQ What Makes a Leader, Daniel Goleman notes 5 EQ key qualities Self-awareness, Self-Regulation, Social Skill, Empathy, Motivation.The capacity to be aware of and express emotions is the oldest and arguably the most effective mode of communication.Enhancing EQSo, how do we get there?Locate the source. While IQ resides in our brains, which trigger our thoughts, EQ lives in our limbic system, which triggers our feelings. The danger is that feelings fire quicker than thoughts. Just as we can train our brain, we must take hold and direct our emotions.Exercise emotional restraint. At the center of EQ is self- control. Exposure to different cultures through diverse relationships and international business assignments will build understanding and will fine-tune control and emotional restraint.Observe, listen and empathize. Buddhists remind us that like our arms and legs, eyes and ears, our emotions are key parts of who we are, of what we become and are central to the life we build. Weve all met people who seem eternally happy or perpetually sad. We learn whos easy to incite and who shows restraint. Observing, listening and empathizing are important skills that allow us to adapt, connect and influence, to build more effective and, I would argue, more fulfilling relationships.Embracing EQEQ is not just about job performance its a life skill that can enhance all our personal interactions.As we grow and add more complexity to our lives, or our companies, industries, and markets, intelligence becomes more instinctual and therefore soft skills play an even bigger role. Imagine the partnerships w e could forge, the songs we could write, the creativity and collaboration we could unlock, just by increasing our EQ. Not because were smarter, stronger or more talented, but because weve trained our emotions to check with our brains first to understand before we act.The world is loaded with self-help books and websites that offer EQ building techniques. Ive developed my own EQ enough to know not to tell you which is best for you. Only to promise that its worth your search.Dinesh Paliwal is president and chief executive officer of HARMAN, a wholly-owned subsidiary of Samsung Electronics Co., Ltd.